Days that have since passed

It's amazing what a picture can do to your memory and senses.

I look at this and immediately have fond memories. But I can also smell the spit-up that covered my shirt. Believe it or not, I sometimes wish I could go back to this time of our family's life...just to hold my babies a bit longer, to kiss their cheeks and to smell the tops of their heads. I do love babies! Looking at this picture, I remember this night very well... Evan had come home from school, ate a quick dinner and rushed out the door to Mutual. He was Young Men's President at the time. Nights were always difficult then. Everyone was always fussy and needed to be loved. Such a task is difficult for one person to fill especially after doing it all day long. BUT like it or not, that night I was left to tend to everyone's needs on my own. There was no normal routine that night. As one can imagine. Cardston fell asleep on the floor under my legs while I fed the girls. Brampton was almost there. And the girls were finally drunk on milk and ready for a few hours of sleep. I remember stepping back to document this crazy time and thinking ...I did it! I can do this all by myself! It wasn't perfect. But that's ok. We're all alive and well.
Every day was a new challenge and each passing day was an accomplishment.

BUT I also feel the anxiety that came with that season of my life...

Days of four little kids all under 5.

With little/no sleep.

Days where the boys were so patient with me as I nursed pretty much ALL.DAY.LONG.

Days where my boys watched lots of shows b/c I only had two arms...and those were full.

Days of loving two babies.

Days and nights of nursing two babies at once.

Days of two crying babies by myself with two rowdy boys.

Days of wearing big t-shirts and smelling like spit-up.

Days of no showers.

Days of a messy house.

Days of LOADS and LOADS of laundry.

Days of soda in my fridge and lots of breast milk in my freezer.

Days of a few tears shed here and there by me.

Since days are gone. They have left scars on parts of my body and my heart.

I know that in the next life, I will visit these days often. Because they were my favorite!

These were GREAT days.

They were never easy.

BUT I was doing what I love most and that made it all worth it.

One thing is for sure...I know that there were unseen angels that were by my side daily. I felt their presence. And I know that one of them was my grandmother-Ellen Peterson. I have felt her near me many times since her passing in 2009. I am ever so grateful for those who minister to us during times of need from the other side. 

I want my family to know that I am thankful for the opportunity to be a mother...though some days would suggest otherwise. I AM. It's all I can think about most days.

In life all must choose at times. Sometimes,

two possibilities are good; neither is evil.

Usually, however, one is of greater import than

the other. When in doubt, each must choose

that which concerns the good of others--the

greater law--rather than that which chiefly

benefits ourselves--the lesser law. The greater

must be chosen whether it be law or thing. -John A. Widtsoe

As a mother, I am striving to choose the greater law--my family.

I am thankful for the family Evan and I have been blessed with.

I am grateful for blessing it is to hold them, to see them, to smell them and to hear what they say.

They are my greatest treasures.

And always will be.

These were and are the best days!!

Great days...that continue TO BE every day that I am with them!

a slow going sat.

today was one of those saturdays that I dreamt about back in November/December. we didn't do a whole lot of anything!! and it's been fabulous. especially after the crazy few months we've had! sigh. cardston went around in his diaper and rain boots (I know you're thinking...what?? diaper?? he's 3 and still has yet to be potty trained. trust me, it's a work in progress) and brampton chose to wear his batman jammies. and from the pictures, you'll notice he also spent the day with leftover chocolate...he's saving it for later. silly boy. he has a major sweet tooth like his mom. he'd eat candy at every meal if I'd let him.

 we took lots of random pictures of everyone. I'm trying really hard to be better at documenting our lives again (and blogging)! I have been horrible since the girls were born. living life is hard enough...remembering to pause and take pictures is almost impossible. but i'll have to admit life with twins is getting a whole lot easier! and notice the two treasures b found in his boxes from Galveston...he's been wearing them all day and will most likely sleep with them on. love him.

 ev and I spent the afternoon cleaning out the garage. our new garage has been stuffed with all our junk and unpacked boxes since we moved in. but we made a nice dent in it today. lots of stuff went to goodwill and I placed several things on craiglist (which I already sold...double yay!!). I love getting rid of stuff that just collects dust!! cleanliness brings me happiness. and I'm so not afraid of throwing stuff away...I had to tell ev to close his eyes a couple of times.

the boys spent the day playing with all their old toys! they haven't seen some of them in 11 months!! it was like Christmas all over again. and notice...my lovely hubby even snuck in a nap on the couch. I'm pretty much the best wife ever! please...sense the sarcasm there.

the after party.

 Forget toys! Santa was smart to only bring the girls one big gift...cause Christmas morning all they cared about were all the balloons. I'm pretty sure Cardston was more excited about the girls' gift than they were. 

 And the boys thoroughly enjoyed playing with all their new toys from Santa. It was relaxing to just sit there and watch them play.

And from the looks on the girls' faces...this had to be their favorite part! mmm...pancakes for breakfast. It definitely was a MERRY Christmas morning.

Christmas Eve

 On Christmas Eve morning and afternoon we enjoyed time with cousins....playing...running...throwing balls...and eating mc d's. And then to top off the day, we went to grama and grampa stout's home for a nice dinner in our finest attire. the stout grandkids reenacted Luke 2 from the Bible. It was precious and the kiddos were adorable.  

 Cardston was sure the cutest little shepard I have ever seen!

After dinner festivities, we came home to prepare for Santa! I love that our boys understand Christmas and get all excited about everything...we put out cookies, milk, and some celery for the reindeer. We placed the boys' wish lists in a mailbox for Santa (since we never made it to see him this year) and Brampton wrote him a little note saying he had been a good boy this year. Then it was off to bed...

I'm pretty sure Santa and his elves worked late into the night for us! All was calm in our home and I couldn't help but think of Mary and what she experienced that night long ago. I can't imagine going into labor and delivering a baby without a hospital...the wonderful nurses...doctors...and most importantly, modern medicine! I am thankful to her, for being the women she was and bringing her son, Jesus Christ into this world. I hope to be able to meet her someday...maybe in the next life. 

Christmas in our OWN home

Christmas this year was a very memorable one! Granted we did spend the holidays with Ev's family...I felt like we had a good balance of our own time and extended family time. So...we pretty much stayed home this year. No traveling for us. Yeah right...can you imagine having to pack-up Christmas now that we have FOUR kids? That's a little overwhelming..well...more like SUPER overwhelming and stressful. Since Ev and I have been married, we have spent the holidays with our families, either in Kansas or Texas. I love being with the ones I love and sharing lasting memories. But....BUT now that we have kids...lots of them...I feel like I'm ready to start our own Christmas traditions. I knew this time would come....and I'm totally ok with it. And this year was the year that kicked it off. It was lovely...we were in our new home...we were able to decorate three trees...we watched many Christmas shows...ate lots of goodies...and I finally put one of my craft bookmarks to use (speaking of which I need to PIN it)! We talked about Christ every night before bed for most of the month. We read different verses from the Bible, Book of Mormon and articles from the Friend with the boys. As always, Christmas music was played non-stop and I felt as though the Spirit of Christmas was with us and in our home. 

For all of this and much more I am grateful for.

 Recognize these stockings?? You may have seen them...good ole Target.

I added the frames with sweet pictures of my CUTE littles (thank you dollar tree...spray painted and embellished with glitter) to the mantle hooks with a little bit of hot glue   

This little guy made an appearance shortly after we moved into our home. We read his book and the boys decided to name him JAM. Not sure what that's all about?? Maybe a twist on JUM?? Yep that's it. We love you Jum.

 And then this tradition....I can't take any credit. I totally copied this idea from my Nato friends. Isn't it so cool though?? I decided that we must do it every year!! I can hardly wait to have tons of these on our mantle. 

And then this was our "fancy" tree as Brampton called it. Red is his favorite color so I figured he would love it. And I'm pretty pleased with the way it turned out...probably our best decorated tree yet. 

We're home.

Life for our little family is quite busy and strange at the moment. But we're back in Galveston. We were away for two months because of Evan's rotation at the University of Kansas and he also had 6 interviews for residency in: Kansas City (KU)...Fort Worth, TX...Little Rock, Arkansas...Lubbock, TX...Kansas City (UMKC)...and San Antonio, TX. He is currently doing a rotation in the ER....which means he works some killer hours. But we're happy to see him when he's not at work or sleeping because he worked all night. And the fact that I'm 8 months pregnant with twins and HUGE makes being a mom to two little boys difficult!! Hence the reason that this is our FIRST official Christmas on our own. Plus, my doctor said no more traveling. And I'm not exactly sure how I feel about it...? But I guess it's good...I've been able to rest and take it easy (which is about all I can do these days).

Right now....I miss these guys.

We sure did have a lot of FUN spending 5 weeks at my parents house!!
And my parents took us to see the Kansas City Missouri Temple (obviously it's in the works). So exciting!
And as always, my children did not want to cooperate for a picture. They were much more interested in throwing rocks through the fence.
.................
Follow the Kansas City Temple Chaser

Neat read on the lumber used for the temple

Snapshots

I have been an extremely lazy blogger lately (if you haven't noticed). Ok maybe a lazy everything. I can't help it. My body is working overtime lately...making twins is hard work!! Much more difficult than carrying just one. But that's quite alright...I am getting all too excited to meet our little girls. Although, these days I feel like I am carrying one large octopus (you were right Leisel). I get hit and kicked in all directions at the same time. It's quite weird. But funny at the same time. Baby A likes to karate chop my bladder 24/7 while Baby B has grown fond of chillin' up in my ribs (leaving me breathless). And as you can imagine....it's only going to get better as they get bigger. ha! Alright. Enough baby talk for now. Here are some of the latest pictures of our family here in Kansas.

Grandpa came home with this awesome piece of machinery one night. I think every boy needs one of these tractors! And as you can imagine...they quite enjoyed themselves.

Brampton and Grandpa

Brampton's drawing of him and Cardston playing with the tractor.

The boys loved Halloween night! They helped gamma pass out candy to all the kids. That was their favorite part...seeing everyone's costumes.

The boys' new favorite place...Cardston calls it Mickey Mouse

The boys have loved having Nickelodeon on every morning. Their new favorite is Umi Zoomi.

Cardston playing with his Aunt Jum.

This is how Cardston likes to watch TV

We have enjoyed meeting up with my bestest friend, Michelle Nato and her niece and nephew. I think if we lived here...Brampton and Layne would be best buds.

And it wouldn't be a true Payzant visit without going to the movies.

And thanks to the freezing temps, we have thoroughly enjoyed the cocomotion and some Stephen's Candycane Cocoa.

Kansas

We're in Kansas! Evan is doing an away rotation at KU Med in orthopedic surgery....which means we get to visit gamma and papa for a little over a month!!! Lucky us. We have really been enjoying our time here thus far (more pictures to come). In fact this past week we went and visited the famous Louisburg Cider Mill.

This was the boys' favorite part....FEEDING THE GOATS!!! I've never heard Cardston squeal and giggle so much. In fact, he was in tears after leaving them.

And I've heard GREAT things about their cider and donuts...so we tried them. And boy, they sure did not disappoint!! Possibly my favorite by far.

Thanks Gamma for the fun adventure!!!